You've seen the episode of Friends when Phoebe talks about lobsters choosing a mate, locking claws, and then never letting go, right? It's a pretty memorable monologue for her from the show. It's also an idea that Glennon over at Momastery uses. She uses it to describe her sister. When I met her at a book signing, I was with one of my lobsters and since we're both on budgets, we have joint custody of the book so Glennon made out the inscription to us and then just wrote the word, "lobsters."
I'm blessed to have two lobsters who are better known as my best friends. A guy I dated pointed out that I can't have two best friends because it negates the superlative and while I agree, I told him he was a boy and didn't understand. My best friends are Amy and Sabrina.
I have theoretically known Amy since the second I was born. She is 5.5 months older than me. Our moms met in 7th grade and became best friends. They then happened to have little girls within 6 months of each other. I think God had a plan for that. Amy and I grew up 30 minutes from each other so it was a big deal to get together. We'd pass the time between play dates by corresponding through letters. They usually contained "homework" for each of us to do since we both wanted to become teachers. Amy fulfilled that goal. I did not. Every time we talk about work I am again reassured of my decision. She, however, loves it.
Amy and I are alike in many ways. We both tend to follow the rules. We both have brown hair and blue eyes, though hers are both lighter shades than mine. We have freckles. We each have two brothers. We like and are good at working with children. We both have serious medical conditions. Amy has a peanut allergy. It's a bummer. Some of our play dates growing up included me going with her to get allergy shots and watching her do her inhaler treatments. I still remember her light blue inhaler spacer. I thought it was pretty cool. It did not phase or alarm me one bit that I never ate peanuts around Amy. It didn't really cross my conscious realm - it was just a part of life.
Due to her own chronic medical fun, Amy doesn't shy away from mine. She can empathize. She can relate to missing out on really random things (Reese's peanut butter cups for her) because of something outside of her control. It makes our health conversations super detailed which probably freaks out those around us, but it also makes them so incredibly normal. She doesn't have any sort of surprised or worried reaction when I tell her things. She asks follow up questions as if she was asking me more details on why my day is going well. I have taken for granted how much of a blessing that has been in my life.
My second lobster is Sabrina. I'm sure we met sometime in 6th grade since we went to middle school together, but our lives didn't really cross until 8th grade when we both dated the same boy. I started dating him shortly after they broke up so of course I was the enemy. We didn't become friends until she invited me to go to the high school service at the church we both attended. We had a class together our freshman year of high school and the rest is history.
Sabrina and I talk so much it's freaky. We also can have entire conversations in just sounds. We speak our own language and we drive her husband insane with it. We also send such a ridiculous amount of texts to each other that trying to find something we talked about through text yesterday is pointless. She's my accountability for exercising and eating well. She's also my motivation to keep moving. The girl is racking up half-marathon medals like it's her job. Sabrina is also a worrier, which I tend to think for the most part, I'm not.
When it comes to my health, she is my balancer of emotions. She has on more than occasion expressed her interest in coming to my doctor's appointments so that she can learn and hear first hand. I guess I don't do a good enough job on my reports. She asks follow up questions because she is preparing herself for the worst case scenario. This has been one of the biggest contributors to me finally getting a handle on the seriousness of my condition. It's one of the reasons why I finally wrote down my health information and always make sure I have it with me. She is the one to whom I take my fears. She lets me feel them and feels them with me and then when I think I'm going to go over the cliff of the enormity of what's going on, she reels me back to safety.
My lobsters are my life line. They didn't meet until we were all in college so while we are not the three best friends that anyone can have (I can't believe a 3rd movie was made...), they are friends through the common bond of me. I am beyond blessed that God has put them in my life to walk through it with me. They both have paved the way for me in marriage and Amy in buying a house. They both are outgoing which brings me out of my shell. My life would have a void if they weren't in it. I would say the cliche that you should get to know them, but I'll pass. I don't share well.
